Application For Permission To Date My Daughter
This application will be considered incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor
Name___________________________ Date of birth_____________
Height______ Weight_______ I.Q.______ G.P.A.___________
SS#____________ D.L.#___________ Boy Scout Rank__________
Home Address (city/st./zip)_________________________________
Do you have one MALE and one FEMALE parent?_____
Do you own a van?_____ Motorcycle?_____ Waterbed?_____
In 50 words or less, what does LATE mean to you?
In 50 words or less, what does DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER
mean to you?
In 50 words or less explain the meaning of ABSTINENCE.
Where to you volunteer your spare time and how many Hrs./wk?
Church you attend?_________________ How often?___________
When would be the best time to interview your mother, father, and minister/priest?__________
Finish each sentence
A. If shot, last place on my body I would want to be wounded is _____
B. If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is____________
C. A women's place is in the_____________________
D. The one thing I hope this application doesn't ask would be_______
E. *When I first meet a girl, the first thing I notice is her________
Note: If answer E begins with or consist of any bodily part and or area below the collar bone, discontinue application and depart the premises keeping head low and moving swiftly in a serpentine pattern.
F. What would you like to be IF you grow to adulthood?_______
Signature______________________ Responsible party___________
Thank you for your interest, Please allow four to six years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved please do not contact us. If you are rejected you will be notified by two of the Little sisters of infinite Mercy and Discipline. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO HIDE.
Disclaimer: This is in no way intended to offend or intimidate any person or song writing guitar playing band member real or fictious. I found a version of this in my daughters things and thought it would be humorous, well at least well at mildly. Brian, I'm still waiting for your application. Anyone interested in a copy can call Cati or Brian @ their new number 303-8425. requests will be a ... well surprise as they know nothing about this.
LOVE YA WEEBS & BRIAN! | 
